Sunday, December 18, 2005

South Texas Musings

My work recently took me down to south Texas. A fascinating place, I used to think that Israel was the Yiddische Texas, now I know that Texas is really the goyische Israel. I'll blog on that topic in a future post.

I pulled out of the rental car stall at the San ANtonio airport in my fancy new poseur shit-kicking Texas-sized SUV and slipped in a Kinky Friedman album. As I headed for Loop 410 west on Texas' "gift" to transportation engineering, the frontage road, the Kinkster's lyrics came in loud and clear over the Country-Western beat:


While traveling through the Lone Star State
I lost my lunch before I ate,
It happened in a pull-ahead café. {yahoo!}
I felt my bones begin to crunch
I saw my name on the "bidnessman’s" lunch
And the 'neck who owned the place stepped up to say:

Hey buddy, are you blind,
Say, partner, can’t you read the sign ?

[Chorus]
We reserve the right to refuse service to you,
Take your "bidness" back to Walgreen’s,
Have you tried your local zoo ?
You smell just like a "comminist,"
You come on through just like a Jew,
We reserve the right to refuse service to you.


All right! Now I'm in a Texan state of mind. And can you believe this guy is running for Governor of Texas?!! Well, as his campaign materials say, "Why the hell not?" Though personally, while I've got some admration for the guy, I think he's going to end up like a second-rate Jesse Ventura. Being an "independent" is a political cop-out. Better the Kinkster should have set his mind to leading the macho-shitkicker wing of the Democrats.

I fear four more years of Republican domination in the Lone Star State.

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